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Nosy Neurotypical Neighbours – What’s up with them?
If I had a nickel for every time I, or someone I know or have Coached or received email from who has Asperger’s Syndrome, thinks that every problem in every social interaction (as adults) is theirs, I’d be sooo rich. Why? Because the world “socializes” us to believe that neurotypicals are normal. Wow! As if – no pun intended.
I have just been through three of the most stressful months of my life in ages due to nosy good for nothing neighbours – each with their own problems – all I’m assuming are neurotypical – one is narcissistic as all get out with no boundaries, hen-pecked, and afraid of his own shadow, for some reason he needs to hide behind women. Another is just plain two-faced who lives next to the one who has no boundaries and just walks up to you out of nowhere and of course, what else, complains about all that’s wrong in his or his family’s life going on and on and by the way, I’m the one with Asperger’s but even I get that if someone is on the phone you don’t interrupt them or if someone (me in this case) is sitting on their stoop with headphones on and reading a digital book that might be a cue (clue) to leave me alone, did he ever, NO!
I try to set boundaries with the guy and next thing you know he’s all out of sorts and acting like I did something to him – typical neurotypical? I dno’t know but definitely not a “normal” one.
Then there is this other neighbour, drinks tons, has next to nothing to say, is over-ridingly negative and super-nosy but yet I am the one with the problem, supposedly? Is she neurotypical – yeah. Normal? Nope.
We as Aspies need to learn to value the differences that we have and that our lives will be lived off the beaten path of all-too-many (not all) neurotypicals are cueless and clueless so please don’t always jump to the conclusion that it is you when things go astray or that it is all you by any means if you have Asperger’s. Let’s face it, Neurotypicals are a very large group and the only thing we know for sure, more or less, is that they do not have any form of autism or Asperger’s. No more, no less do we know. They come in all variety of crazy, weird, off, eccentric, crazy, judgmental, needy, annoying, nosy, etc., etc., etc.
So much for thinking one can find anything but toxic neighbours where I currently live. After all it is not a community at all. It is a bunch of angry individuals because things don’t get fixed unless you fight for repairs. Some very strange people live here. All I’ve been wanting since I moved here was to be left alone by them to be in my interest zone and my work zone and just left alone.
There is so much more wrong in this world than having Asperger’s, so I hope you will learn something I recently learned, it just isn’t always us when things go nuts, wrong, etc. And I don’t know about you, but as an Aspie, I’d have to say neurotypicals totally love to gossip, are often very toxic people (not all) but the ones I live near for sure, and they are really nosy – I just don’t have time for it. It’s all been a bunch of fake needy neurotypical yakety-yakety from the time I moved in. I’m looking forward to the time I can move out.
By the way if you are an Aspie adult and you can stand living in a high density complex, please let me know how you do it – you know the type of place with way too many people all over the place and so many so nosy and so many always wanting to talk to you until you have to get bluntly honest with them and tell them to go away.
© A.J. Mahari, September 15, 2012 – All rights reserved.
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